When I was growing up, most of my friends were people I left behind—or they left me—throughout a childhood of wonderful travels. We’d write letters. We’d meet up on occasion, if we happened to be in the same country at the same time. Those friendships were very important—perhaps even more so since there was such intensity to our rare encounters. We had to trust we were friends, with very little ongoing proof that either of us still cared. As I grew older, I learned more about grown-up expectations around friendships. Why hasn’t she called? She shouldn’t this or that. He didn’t remember something or other. Did I say something wrong? The loop is endless and it does nothing to improve a friendship. Let the friendship be what it is. We don’t always have to meet for a coffee in order to show that we care about each other. Some friendships will set sail and some will harbor nearby. Trusting each friendship to be what it is and when it needs to be is the sea all around us.
