Stillness 7-24: Why is trust such a vital part of stillness and joy? What can we really trust in? The old adage used to be that the only two things we could trust in were “death and taxes.” They were for sure. I think you can trust in death—that it will come and we’ll be transformed through the process in some way. But taxes are different. I wouldn’t trust taxes. They are business as usual—they are something that must be attended to, like brushing your teeth or meeting a deadline. It’s a responsibility and obligation—not something to trust.
And there’s no place for trust in matters of law, business, or politics. Don’t be fooled. Don’t be naive. Be meticulously and scrupulously careful, self-protective, and on guard.
But in matters of the heart, your naivete shimmers like the sweetness of a trusting child. Your innocence is your greatest wisdom—the wisdom of wonder. Being open to the world, to other people, and to your lovely self is your great source of joy.
When you trust something, you can relax into it. You can trust that spring will come when you’re in the heart of winter. There’s something organic and real about it, like growth, death, and rebirth. There’s nothing you have to do about it—it’s not your responsibility to address is, so you don’t have to get all armored and vigilant. You can let it be what it is.
The people you can trust are the ones who let you be who you are, without wishing you were different or better or someone else. You can trust in all your relationships, even when they come and go, just as seasons come and go. A marriage that comes to end has not failed—it changes and transforms, just like seasons do. If we could shift relationships with gratitude and letting go, rather than judgement, recriminations, and grief, how much happier we would be!
And what about our children? At a certain point, we cannot tell them what to do, what to eat, what to study. We can’t advise them on their friends, their passions, or their lifestyle. We’ve taught them everything we can, far more by example more than by words. All we can say is, “I absolutely trust you’ll choose the best way, do the right thing, live for the highest good for yourself and those you meet. I trust your decisions will be beneficial in some way, even if that way seems mysterious. I trust good things will open up for you, even when the way looks the darkest. I trust in you and I trust in Life.”
The hardest thing of all, as we grow more hardened and more experienced, is to trust ourself. When we’ve gone down paths we wish we hadn’t, or felt the sting of remorse or regret too many times, we guard not against others but against ourself. But for the sake of wellbeing and happiness, it’s essential to trust ourself. To trust in our intuitive wisdom and to trust in Life. Sometimes trusting is the only way we can be free of our choking, constraining ideas that we are wrong, hopeless, helpless, or confused. Trust breaks the chains of egotism and ideas of control. It’s by releasing control that we can be free. And it’s when we feel free that we can truly love.
Make this your mantra: I trust. I trust. I trust. Say it over and over to the inner child in your heart. You’ll find you move beyond trust to faith, and beyond faith to certainty—the certainty that all is well—all is well—all is well.